ELLSWORTH, Maine — It wasn’t until January 2010, four months after the boy was born, that Ryan Masoner was told he was a father and that a couple in Hancock County had been appointed temporary guardians of his son.

The 24-year-old Fort Wayne, Ind., resident now is awaiting results of a court-ordered DNA test that will prove whether Tobias is his son, but there seems to be a general consensus among involved parties that he most likely is.

If he is, a recent Maine supreme court decision could help him regain custody of the 2½-year-old child. Late last month, the Law Court vacated a Hancock County probate court decision to terminate Masoner’s parental rights.

Because probate court proceedings and documents are not considered public in Maine, the people involved in the case are not identified by name or town of residence in the Law Court decision, except for the boy who is referred to only as ‘Tobias D.’

“I knew nothing about this,” Masoner told the Bangor Daily News recently about the September 2009 birth of his son. “I know deep down inside he’s mine.”

In January 2010, when Tobias’ mother told Masoner she had given birth to a boy in Maine four months earlier, she already had left the baby with family friends in Hancock County to act as the infant’s unofficial guardians, according to the written Law Court decision.

In November 2009, when the family friends petitioned Hancock County Probate Court to be declared the baby’s official guardians, the baby’s mother told the probate court judge she had had at least three sexual partners and did not know who the father was.

Court documents indicate that at some point during her pregnancy she told Masoner he might be the father and that she planned to have an abortion.

Despite what she told the probate court, Tobias’ mother had concluded Masoner was the father, based on the boy’s appearance at the time of his birth, according to the Law Court decision.

In December 2009, the probate court gave legal temporary guardian status of the boy to the Hancock County couple, who also have been seeking to adopt Tobias. Masoner found out a month later that he had a son who now was living in Maine.

When he found out about his son, Masoner could not travel to Maine because he was serving an eight-month sentence in jail. He had been ordered to serve house arrest after being convicted of receiving stolen property but violated the terms of his house arrest and so had to spend time behind bars, Masoner said.

Over the next several months, while he was incarcerated, he and his parents, who own and run a masonry business in Fort Wayne, filed multiple documents with the probate court in Ellsworth, challenging the guardianship decision and seeking to establish parental rights for Masoner.

In January of 2011, after Masoner was released from jail, he traveled to Ellsworth for a hearing on whether he should be given parental rights by probate court. There, according to a recent Law Court decision, Judge James Patterson determined that Masoner “failed to carry his burden of proving that he is able to take responsibility for [Tobias] within a time reasonably calculated to meet the child’s needs” and failed to establish that “a declaration of his parental rights will be in the child’s best interest.”

Patterson’s decision effectively terminated any rights Masoner might have as Tobias’ father.

The Law Court, however, disagreed and on March 29 vacated Patterson’s decision. The Law Court said Patterson relied primarily on Masoner’s financial situation and “immaturity” to determine whether he was fit to care for his son.

“These factors were not a proper basis to find [Masoner] an unfit parent,” the Law Court decision states. “Socioeconomic status or a finding that a parent is less financially stable than potential guardians is not the type of finding that renders a parent unfit as a matter of law unless it is also determined that he is unable or unwilling to ensure that the child’s basic needs are met.”

Masoner’s attorney, Rosemarie Giosia of Ellsworth, and the temporary guardians’ attorney, Amy Faircloth of Bangor, have not responded to multiple requests this week for comment about the case. The Bangor Daily News is not identifying Tobias’ biological mother or the boy’s temporary guardians because, aside from information provided by the Masoner family, their identities have not independently been confirmed.

Masoner said last week during a phone interview that he was “stunned” to find out Tobias’ mother had kept the boy’s existence a secret from him. He said he is upset that Tobias’ mother, who lives in Indiana, and the boy’s temporary guardians have sought to deny his rights as a father.

“I was asking myself, ‘Why would she do this?’ I’d never done anything bad to her,” Masoner said. “I’ve done nothing to these people. I don’t know why they’re doing this to me and Tobias.”

Masoner said he has met Tobias in person twice during the legal dispute, once at a McDonald’s in Bangor in January 2011 and a second time in June of that year when Tobias’ temporary guardians brought him to Fort Wayne. During the second visit, he said, his father gave him the day off from the family masonry business, allowing Masoner and the temporary guardians to take Tobias to a local zoo and then to a clothing store, where Masoner bought the boy some clothes.

That day was the most recent time he saw Tobias face to face, but he said he has had online video chats with him 15 or 20 times since then.

“It was hard,” he said of seeing the boy so briefly in Indiana. “You have the feeling that you’re missing something.”

Masoner acknowledged he has had other run-ins with the law since serving time for receiving stolen property. He said that last July, he was intoxicated when he got behind the wheel of a car, got in an accident and then left the accident scene. He later was ordered to take alcohol awareness classes, which he has been doing, but said he has not had to spend any more time behind bars. He said depression over his separation from Tobias contributed to his bad experiences with alcohol.

A check of online criminal records from Allen County, Indiana, where Fort Wayne is located, indicates that Masoner doesn’t have other significant criminal violations in his background. Other violations by Masoner listed in the database include possession of tobacco while under the age of 18, possession of marijuana, and underage consumption of alcohol, all of which date from 2005 or 2006.

If the DNA test proves Masoner is Tobias’ father, there still will be legal issues that have to be decided. The Law Court decision vacated the probate court decision to terminate Masoner’s parental rights, but it did not establish that Masoner in fact does have parental rights as Tobias’ father.

According to the Law Court decision, the point is moot if the DNA tests come back negative. If they come back positive, Masoner still will have to go back to probate court to establish his parental rights.

The Law Court decision goes on to note that even if Masoner wins custody of the boy, the probate court should establish a transition process that would lessen the effect of transferring custody of the boy. The justices wrote that the process could include rights of contact, counseling and rehabilitation, among other things.

Should Masoner be awarded custody, the justices recognized in their decision, “the process of removing the child from the only home he has ever known will be a difficult and painful one for all involved. We encourage the probate court to determine the best way to introduce the child to his father.”

The Law Court decision also raises the question of whether the continuing temporary guardianship of Tobias with the Hancock County couple is appropriate. Assuming Masoner is found to be Tobias’ biological father, the decision says, the probate court must immediately reconsider its 2009 temporary guardianship order. In a footnote, the order suggests that the probate court judge could have terminated it already.

“The mother represented in her first four affidavits that the child’s father was unknown. There is now no dispute that she believed [Masoner] to be the father, and informed him and the court of that fact just weeks after filing her affidavit [in the fall of 2009].

“When, in January of 2010, the court realized that the father had been identified,” the footnote continues, “it could have terminated the guardianship because it was based on the fraud or misrepresentation of the mother.”

In the same footnote, the Law Court decision indicates that state law sets a limit on how long a temporary guardianship can last. By statute, “the authority of a temporary guardianship may not last longer than six months with some exceptions not applicable here,” the footnote reads.

While Masoner continues his efforts to be permanently reunited with Tobias, the Indiana man says he has had other positive developments in his life, including becoming engaged and fathering another child, Ryan Masoner Jr.

Masoner said he wants to gain custody of Tobias so Tobias can live with him and his large extended family in Fort Wayne, which includes Masoner’s parents, grandparents, a great-grandfather and others.

Masoner said he knows that once the DNA test results come back, he still will have to gain legal custody of the boy and that it won’t be easy for Tobias to move in suddenly with a family he has never known. But he said his being an everyday father to Tobias is the right thing to do.

“I know it’s going to be hard for him, but at the same time he’s going to be where he should be,” Masoner said. “He’s got a big family here waiting for him.”

Follow BDN reporter Bill Trotter on Twitter at @billtrotter.

A news reporter in coastal Maine for more than 20 years, Bill Trotter writes about how the Atlantic Ocean and the state's iconic coastline help to shape the lives of coastal Maine residents and visitors....

Join the Conversation

116 Comments

    1. Yep. Seems this boy has a dad who wants him and a large extended family too. It would be a shame if he loses all that love. I’m sure it will be a sad day for the couple who are raising him. Where is King Solomon when we need him? 

  1. What a horrible atmosphere for men in the State of Maine when it comes to parenthood. Congratulations to this young man, for he has beaten the odds with the high and low card against him. Obviously he had access to much money, or some way to good legal help. Again congratulations because he’s pulled off the almost impossible in a state that heavily discriminates against men.

  2. how do you know do you know them personally, and if they had given the father his child back in the beginning the pain would have been less all around reply to mamma

    1. Give the boy back to his father??—–When did he have him?   I guess I must have missed that when I read the story!

    2. why would they just “give” this child to someone claiming to be the father–DNA results are not back yet are they?  It is too bad that it is taking so long as this child is becoming more and more attached to the people who have been raising him.

  3. A judge is going to place this child in one of two homes-18 years from now or so everyone involved will see if the system worked to the child’s benefit.

  4. If this man is the boy’ father, he deserves a chance. Shame on the boy’s mother for not letting him have the child if she didn’t want him.

    1. Why?  What chance is it that he “deserves.”  A man’s sperm works it’s way into an egg, and that makes him a “father.”  Intention is important here.  Even now, this guy has repeated history, and yet, still isn’t married to the woman – he is only “engaged.”  Well, I’ll tell you — I know that being “married” first may not mean much, but it’s something more to shoot for than a one-night, or short-term encounter.

      1. “Why? What chance is it that he ‘deserves.'”

        If he’s the father, that’s all that is needed.

        Are you suggesting that all unintended pregnancies should result in the children being taken away from both parents? That’s absurd.

      2. We do not know all the details . A man dose not have many rights. If a woman say you are not the father could you make her give the baby a DNA test? without being charged with harassment? In my case She always said I was not the father and wanted me to leave her alone.Apparently at least one other was DNA tested .i was told that man was the father then almost 17 years latter served papers from DHHS saying I owed all this back support. I had no right any I would have had i was cheated out of. Any DNA did prove I was not the child. The child contacted me before the DNA came back.  Anyways It could have worked out differently an I would have been cheated of knowing the child and owed the money.

          1. Thanks I mean the child’s father. Any way I have a son that is 13. His mother lived with me till he was 4 1/2 . She married another guy . He lives with me half the time. His mother had a few issues . My son I do take care of I am not his biological father either. I have learned not to rescue a damsel in distress. Not all men are bad guy’s the system dose not give men the same rights women have. A lot more to being a father than just DNA.  Some people are cheated out of a chance of being a father by women and the system . Not the case with my son bio dad he has 5 kids he never supported . Warrants for his arrest in 2 different State’s . Comes to Maine and gets a $20k check for SSI the only jobs he ever he was being a professional con man.

      3. Once again- what are you talking about? Yes, his sperm made him a father and now he would like to become the Child’s Daddy. Intention at the time of conception means NOTHING. I daresay MOST of us were probably not “planned’. And he isn’t married to his other son’s Mother but they are engaged and have made a family. Are you saying only married people should raise children? This is the 21st century Mr/Mrs Pointaway. A family sometimes even has 2 Mommies or 2 Daddies. Learn to deal. 

        1. The Moderators deleted my post stating essentially that single people and non-heterosexual couples, and two or more unrelated people who aren’t sexually involved, who are committed to raising a child are fine parents.  And don’t tell me to “learn to deal.”  Meaningless comment.

          1. You talk about him “still not being married” like THAT is the end all be all…. and it’s not. You also seem very interested in the way this child was conceived and that is irrelevant- the point is, the child is here now and he has a father who wants to raise him and has a right to raise him. 

  5. If the DNA proves he is the father, then that right there is enough evidence for him to take custody of the boy.   It is nice that the family took the baby from the girl, but it is only a temporary custody.

    1. And just because someone says, “Hey take care of my baby- his Daddy doesn’t know he exists” doesn’t mean he’s yours to keep forever.

      1. I don’t think she told them that Daddy doesn’t know he exists, I think she hadn’t a clue who the father was.

  6. It is a sad situation when a woman is pregnant and doesn’t know who the father is.  Dad’s rights?  What about the child.  He needs to be concerned about what is best for his son?  I would like to see him stay in his son’s life but am not so sure that taking this child away from the only home he has known and giving him to this young man who does not have his own life together is in the child’s best interest.  It is a regretable situation right from the start.

    1. Just wondering if you actually read the article?  She knew who the Father was. What is having your life together exactly? The guardians could have backed out long ago when the child was still a baby merely 4 mos old when they found out the father was not going to consent, so because they had money to throw around on attorneys and drag this out for now 2 and 1/2 years they should keep the child from a family that is waiting to love and care for him in Indiana? Where does the court play in this? They should have made sure this was done correctly to begin with and maybe this series of events would have never taken place. Or maybe the Mother should have told the truth from the beginning.

    2. I agree Ronnie, I am also guessing these guardians did not know that the mother was keeping this child secret from his biological father.  Hopefully the judge will make sure his decision is based on what is best for the child.

  7. I was served papers saying I owed almost 17 years back child  support. The mother stated back then I was not the father.  It was not a fun process . I was told if I did not take a DNA test I would be forced to pay the child support for all the years I was cheated out of knowing my child. Well the DNA test turned I was not the father.  I already raise a son who I do not happen to have DNA in common. Even though his mother is married we still share custody. I may not have any legal rights. But I am still his father.

    1. Something similar happened to me in the eighties. Back then, there was no DNA testing available yet, but common blood typing which came back inconclusive. I was one of 4 possibles. Not only was I denied 3 years of the childs life, but had to pay up anyway. This person is an adult now and is not my child, but the deal is I had no rights at all. Except the right to pay.

      1. The sad part is you can never get that time or money back. If a woman waits years to inform a man he might be the father or Lies about it . the man is cheated out of his rights as a parent . You can not put a money value on that. Then expecting a man to pay for what he was cheated out of is so wrong. Lets say the woman is seeing someone else. Got prego again 3 months latter an married to some else would a man have the right to demand a DNA test if she denied sleeping with you? or would you be charged with harassment? Men do not have rights . Not all men are selfish pigs like some feminist groups would want you to believe. 

  8. …. financial situation and “immaturity” to determine whether he was fit to care for his son. wow nice Court..based on that 90% of the people on MaineCare should not have their children!   The child is young..there will be no trauma of him moving to be with his father.    Really does anyone clearly remember when they were 2 1/2 years old……the child will be find.

    1. I agree… He will be fine but they need to speed the process up and not slow it down. Anyone remember the Baby Jessica case way back when? 

    2. I am certainly not saying that the father shouldn’t get his child but their certainly will be trauma for a 2 and a half year old that is taken from the only home and parents he has ever known.  Glad to see that the child and father have had visits and are getting to know each other with a webcam, should make it a bit easier for this child.  I do hope that if the father gets custody of his child that he will keep in touch with the people who loved and protected his son for the first two and a half years of his life.

  9. exactly 11 years ago my son was put in this type of situation although he was only 19 (and had a juvenile record)  at the time he wanted his son but was told no he was in an adopted foster home and the mother had lost her rights to raise the child and had signed him over to the state the day he was born and the state refused to let him sign the birth certificate.  My son was at the hospital when he was born but was denied seeing him after she signed him over to the state.  To make a long story short it took us four months of fighting the state of maine and a dna test (which took 2 of those months for results) before a judge decided in his favor that the state should never had taken his son and he was granted full custody.  11 years later I have a healthy happy grandson who loves his dad.  So people please there can be a positive out of this but what right does anyone have to deny this child the right to know and be with his natural parent.  The state will make him take a parenting class and also monitor the situation for 6 months after.  I know been there done that.   Also if having a criminal record means you can’t raise a child then there are alot of children in Maine that I guess need a new place to live.

    1. I totally agree with everything you said, I was also married to twice to men that had custody of their sons so times are changing when it comes to custody of the children going only to the mother.  My only concern in this case is that the father couldn’t control himself and went out driving while drunk, something you just don’t do–especially when you are fighting for your rights to parent your own child.  Makes me wonder if he will be able to control his behavior once he has a toddler to take care of. 

  10. When Angus was Governor, he would never have had a chance to get him back.. Angus King loved the foster child money making scheme.. The Feds paid big money for the head count in Maine. They liked taking cute kids because they were easier to place,.

  11. What a story. My heart goes out to both sides of the folks that this story involves.  The mother is at fault in all of this by her deception.  I will say that I admire that this young man is stepping up to the plate and trying to take responsibility.  My heart aches for the guardians who have been fill in parents and have bonded with this little boy.  They had to have known going in to this situation of the risks involved.

  12. if the child is his of course he should get custody only makes sense the child belongs with his father if the mother doesen’t want him how many kids never get to be with or know who there father is and the fact that he is making an effort to get custody of his son is def a sign that he is somewhat responsible just because someone spends time in jail doesen’t make them evil he just made some bad choices there are plenty of other parents out there that i know of that are monsters compared to this gjuy

    1. a bad choice that could have destroyed innocent people’s lives or even killed his own child if he had been driving drunk with his son?  I only hope the judge makes sure an indepth home study is done to make sure the father and his home is safe for this small child.

      1. Maybe there should be an in depth home study where the child is now, you assume the private guardians do not have any backgrounds that may be questionable as well, the state didn’t choose the guardians the Mother did. You also assume this Father would drink and drive with a child you do not know do you? These accusations are all but factual. You do not know where or what position this Father is now. In July when he got the charge his rights were terminated he did not know obviously that the Law court would side with him, maybe he was distraught over it all , I do not feel it is ok to pass judgment on someone we know nothing about but what was shared in this article.

  13. This just kills me. It is ok to just throw a PFA on someone based on heresy and a mental health evaluation with negative results, and disrupt the home, and place a traumatic change for the children and adult thrown out of the house, but to let them back in, everyone must except slow steps and change back even though those involved have not gotten used to the original traumatic change?   Something simple like a finding a home, and now the children have to move out of their neighborhood months after losing a full time parent that was more present than the other, according to a Spurwink representative and their interviews with people and the children.

    A big change for anyone is traumatic.  How about starting full day kindergarten after being home for 4-5 years or so?  Not everyone can afford pre school or qualify for head start, if there is a head start program.  

    Big change is not just traumatic for children and autistic people.  Look at empty nest, layoffs, and retirements.  Some people go back to work after retiring because the change is too much.  

    It is also not easy to change careers in this current economy or finding one either.  Even employers do not want to hire someone because the change could be too traumatic? One must step back into work, even if they worked years ago.  Once you know how to ride a bike, you never forget they say, but it seems like businesses don’t think that is so true.  After years you might not have the ability?  Even part time work isn’t enough of a step for full time work so it seems.  They are more concerned about how traumatic a big change could be?

    Yet, employers want people who can change with the changing environment?

    So should we be so protective of children, or let them get used to change as children, or should we have more concern with adults too, and then how can or do we handle employment and family changes to make it easier on all?

    Can it be traumatic or cruel to linger with people?

    Children grow up fast.

  14. Hey!  Why haven’t we’ve heard about the thief that ripped off all the dollars that were dontated to Healtcare Charities?  After all, it is your money?  Or not?

    1. My guess is they are still building the case for an arrest…. It’s not like tv. These things take time.

  15. I work at healthecare company that pay all  the  “corporate” people  well over the three mark, but all they do is walk around that praise the people that make them look good.  

  16. Bill Trotter:  “general consensus” is redundant.  You can tighten up your writing by dropping “general”.  “Consensus” says it all.

  17. What a bunch of BS this man is stepping up and taking responsibility and he is having to fight, if this man was an abuser and druggie he would have had this child in custody already. i guess ill never understand the justice system.

  18. i wish people would practice birth control, or…..how about some self restraint & a bit of celibacy? i feel so sorry for all these children with who knows who for fathers, welfare mothers, abusive backgrounds etc. I hope this child fares well.. feel so sorry for these children born in these sticky circumstances.

    1. Agreed but for the “welfare mothers.”  There are women who are receiving assistance because they believed the guy they actually married, before they became pregnant, even, wanted a family – but – big surprise – they take off and leave the woman pregnant, and/or with a young child.  Let’s just avoid the term, eh?  A person is rarely wholly their societal label.

  19. It’s stories like this that make me wish they sent birth control to every person in the US in the mail. Seriously, it could have been one of many men who fathered the child? He can’t asset his rights because he’s in jail? Good grief. I’m sure I’ll get a bunch of “haven’t you ever made a ‘mistake'” replies…

  20.  Speaking as a single Dad raising my children on my own,  my hat is off to you. I won full custody of my kids a few years ago and I have enjoyed every minute of it. 

    1. This comment is really out of line. Put some more thought into what you are saying you have repeated yourself by saying the same opinion over and over I think we get the picture of your opinion.

      1. I have put a lot of thought into what I am saying–you keep repeating what your opinion is, guess there is no reason for me to continue to try to explain my opinions to you as you are pretty set in what you think.  There is absolutely nothing out of line by my comment, it does frighten me to know that you have stated you know so many people who drink and drive.  I also do not assume that the home the child is in has no issues—so obviously you are putting words into my mouth –so I guess you are not “getting the picture of what my opinion is.”  I sincerely do hope this father does the things he needs to do to get his child—I DO assume the judge will look at both home situations when deciding what is in the best interest of this child.  It seems obvious by your posts that you consider it just a little error in judgement if someone gets “distraught” and decides to drink and drive.  I am guessing you have never lost a loved one to a drunk driver–I believe your attitude would change drastically if you had.  I hope this guy learned from that incident as it certainly could have ended much differently.  Feel free to not read my posts if you find them thoughtless and repetitive.

  21. So you are suggesting that parents who have broken a law or laws or have spent time incarcerated should have their children removed from their care and or should have no rights to their children?

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *