In September, when senator-elect Angus King (then still a candidate) was the 41st guest to fill my deployed husband’s empty chair at the dinner table as part of our yearlong project “Dinner with the Smileys,” he was greeted in the front yard by my three boys chasing each other with foam swords. King, a two-term former Maine governor, had a long bakery bag tucked under his arm. He pulled a French baguette from it, and wielding the food like sword, joined the boys’ battle.
When U.S. Sen. Susan Collins was a guest in January, she came with homemade brownies that had nuts in them. The boys devoured the dessert, but picked out the nuts and left them in a pile on the table. Lindell, 5, climbed over and across the senator’s lap like she was his aunt.
When lunch was late getting to the table during our Dinner with the Smileys with U.S. Rep. Mike Michaud, the representative flipped over a napkin and challenged Owen, 9, to a game of tic-tac-toe.
At our 21st dinner, former governor John Baldacci played catch in the muddy backyard with Ford, 11. He let our 40-pound dog Sparky sit in his lap.
Basically, it’s hard to be a politician around three young boys, or maybe, in particular, my three boys.
An unexpected outcome of Dinner with the Smileys is that the boys, with all their naivete, strip our guests of their VIP status and titles. Around the dinner table, everyone — politicians, authors, artists and, yes, even the teacher who supposedly lives at school — becomes more human. How can they not? When you’re passing butter to a politician or showing him where to find the bathroom after dinner, it’s hard to treat him as anything less or more than simply human.
It was no different earlier this month, when we were invited to dinner with Paul and Ann LePage at the Blaine House in Augusta for our 49th dinner. Being invited to the governor’s mansion is an amazing opportunity. The house alone is historical. So I was surprised later that week when photographer Andrea Hand uploaded pictures of our dinner to the project’s Facebook page and our “likes” plummeted. It seemed as if the bottom had dropped out on our more than 6,000 fans. And then former followers of the page wrote to tell me how shallow and ignorant I was to dine with a politician they hate.
For the record, throughout the past 51 weeks, we have had dinner with people from varied political backgrounds, even if they are not currently serving in a public office. I haven’t agreed politically with all of our guests, but that has never been the purpose of the dinners. Rather, the purpose has been to fill up, rather than wish away, our time until my husband returns next month. And besides, if I have to agree politically with everyone I share a meal with, I would never see 75 percent of my friends.
What I have tried to teach the boys is this: Judge politicians’ views in a political setting or in the voting booth. But at dinner, treat them as you would any other human being.
And Gov. LePage is nothing if not human with his incredible childhood story of perseverance. When he was 11 years old, his abusive father paid him a 50-cent piece to lie to a doctor and say his bruises were from a fall down the stairs. LePage took the 50 cents and ran away. For two years, he lived alone on the streets and slept in horse stables at night. He continued to go to school, worked three jobs, and later finished college and got his master’s degree. His personal motto is, “If it is to be, it is up to me.”
My boys were speechless as they heard this. Later, they were grateful when LePage gave them bracelets with the ten 2-letter-words motto printed on them. My oldest son continues to repeat the motto nearly two weeks later.
How could any of this — regardless of your opinion of the governor’s politics — have been a negative thing for my children?
We live in a highly polarized political world. Leaders are demonized for what people know about them only through media accounts. But at the dinner table, my boys have benefited from a fuller picture. They have gotten to know the human being. And, yes, it’s true that not everyone has this privilege. Not everyone can eat with a senator. But shouldn’t we give them the benefit of the doubt regardless? Shouldn’t we be able to separate the person from the politics?
I don’t necessarily agree politically with everything President Barack Obama does either. But I suspect his supporters would ask me to set that aside and appreciate the man for what he has accomplished and overcome in his life. And, in fact, I do. If Obama had come to dinner, he would have been greeted by the same loud, rowdy boys and picky eaters. Lindell would have climbed in his lap. Sparky might have gotten fur on his pants. But mostly, Obama would have been greeted with an open mind and an eagerness to know more about him as a person.
Maine author and columnist Sarah Smiley’s writing is syndicated weekly to publications across the country. She and her husband, Dustin, live with their three sons in Bangor. She may be reached at www.Facebook.com/Sarah.is.Smiley.
So much for tolerance.
God bless you and your family. We need more balance and tolerance for diverse views. In fact, we need more venues like yours to encourage diversity of opinion.
As much as I admire your home dinners for various Maine politicians, it remains puzzling to many Mainers that Gov. LePage, having suffered such abuse in childhood, would grow up to be a bully without serious concern for other Mainers in dismal situations not all that different from his own. Far from being sympathetic toward their plight, he has done a great deal to make their situations still more difficult.
It is simply a matter of household economics. You cannot spend more than you make. No real puzzle there. That being said, the Governor could be more artful in articulating his position.
The governor’s actions and policies reveal a flagrant lack of respect for state workers, teachers, union members, welfare recipients, and for those who have differing political views.
Respect needs to be in the foundation of the house, not just the window-dressing.
you want me to respect anyone who has been on welfare more then a year…. welfare is not a career. i am willing to help anyone in need out but not people i dont know thinking i owe them something …… the gov is trying to get us back to you get what you put in ….
Mainewtf…if it has really been a matter of household economics and not spending more than the state is making, explain to me why then, the Governor and GOP legislature would pass tax cuts that would deliberately reduce tax revenues. And I’m not buying the excuse that tax cuts spur tax income because that has been proven countless times to be nothing more than a figment of a Republican’s imagination. George Bush proved that most recently by passing two tax cuts that should never have happened..and not only were tax revenues reduced significantly (such that he increased the deficit by 7 trillion dollars); but also job growth during his administration was the worst of any president other than his Dad’s since the big depression. Had the Governor and Legislature truly been concerned about revenues…a tax cut, especially ones favoring the rich, would not have been enacted..not based on household economics…it’s all been about repaying favors to the rich donars that backed his and the leglislature’s elections all at the expense of people who really need help.
If the Bush and LePage tax cuts for the rich were supposed to create jobs we should be swimming in them nay, drowning in them.
what 4 years later still bushes fault….. educate yourself carters freddie and fannie destroyed the economy with help with clinton
If it is about the deficit Carter and Clinton lowered it . Reagan Tax cost increased it a great deal . Tell me how lowering Taxes on the rich will lower the Deficit again? Regan tried so did Both bushes . Obama is not doing a great job but can anyone tell me how cutting taxes on the well to do will lower the deficit??????
Sorry Henderson, BUT Obama has done an excellent job getting the country back out of the grips of a potential 2nd GOP created depression. The economic growth over the past 4 years has been the strongest following any closely similar recession in history (it took America 13 years to recover from the first depression). And especially considering that the GOP has blocked virtually every effort Obama has made to get the economy going …by sitting on two of his jobs bills, doing nothing more than knowingly wasting millions of taxpayer dollars taking foolhardy votes time and again….30 times they voted on one bill they knew was dead in the water; and with companies like Bain having continued to destroy American companies and ship jobs overseas all the time and even during the presidential race (yes Mitt knew he and his cohorts were ripping apart just one more company while he was tauting that he was going to create jobs in America), all knowing full well that they were continuing to throw more Americans onto unemployment in difficult times, which in my mind is nothing short of a travesty. How can you say that 32 straight months of job growth, and a stock market that has more than doubled in 4 years and an auto industry that was on the verge of bankruptcy 4 years ago but which has actually attained this year the honor of being the largest selling brand in the world (GM), is not all part of an excellent recovery from the potential abyss of total depression??
I agree . What I wrote about the deficit was the republican have a worse track record than the dems. It is not a perfect world both sides have thier faults . I voted for Obama hoping he is the worse of to evils . I do not think either of them are evil but just do not have the best interest of the people first . Its the whole do your buddies a favor first them the people . Some see this as the end of the world . I saw it as the end of the world when Bush got his second term . I was strongly against the Iraq war before it started. Thinking back at the now a democrat might have started the war if they were in power . We need more informed voters and more than just 2 parties to chose from . I was very disappointed In how the media only gives to 2 parties the spot light only 2 parties at the debates . Seems to come down to money .
Of course it’s still Bush’s fault…in his last year the country was losing 800,000 jobs/month, hundreds of companies were going belly up (with Romney and his ilk shipping hundreds of thousands of jobs to China), and millions of people were having their houses foreclosed on and Wall Street had lost more than 50% of its vallue down to around 6,600. How in Heaven’s name would you ever expect the economy to recover from that in 4 years…you have to mentally delusional to think that we have recovered from an economic disaster that actually far exceeded what happened back in the 1930s when the GOP’s mismanagement allowed America to spiral into the Great Depression. The problem today isn’t with Obama and the recovery…it is actually the strongest recovery from a disaster such as Bush created in history. The problem is Americans…they’re so attuned today to instant gratification they expect everything to be fixed within an instant. We’ll the Great Depression took America 13 years to recover from and that was sped up because WWII provided a stimulus. AND we’re not in year 10 or 8 or 6…we’re only 4 years past a disaster that is only barely exceeded by the big depression that didn’t throw just 8% of workers on employment, far more than 20% were unemployed..an Americans can’t even see that Obama’s efforts to save the auto industry, provide stimulus to prevent further job losses has saved the country from a very poossible 2nd Great Depression… And I can tell you, the irresponsible GOP did everything in it’s power over the past 4 years to push America into that disaster.
Cash for clunkers really worked too !
if you are trying to revive an automobile industry, encourage gasoline conservation, and give people a cash incentive to get rid of gas guzzlers, it was not such a bad idea. if there are less cars around there’s more reason to buy a new one built by people who work manufacturing automobiles.
Most progressive/liberals I know do not buy American made cars. In my neighborhood it’s the underemployed that are always scrambling to find a cheap used car. The only ones who benefited for the cash for clunker cars were two incomes no kids crowd.
And the poor who rely on those older used cars to be affordable got it stuck up their ***.
Apparently everyone who makes over $20,000 AGI a year is rich? We have three tax brackets in Maine, the top bracket is for everything over $20,000 AGI. So to say he cut taxes for the rich is not painting a complete picture as the number of individuals that falls into that bracket is roughly 80% of all Maine income tax payers.
Here are the tax brackets (2012):
http://www.maine.gov/revenue/forms/1040/2012/RateSched_12.pdf
Look, I get it, he is a Republican, Republicans are evil, they hate the poor, minorities, the elderly, they are directed by the Koch brothers to eliminate labor unions and drive down the minimum wage, they want to bring us back to the late 1800’s/early 1900’s, I get it! But saying that he cut taxes for the rich is simply not an accurate statement.
Besides we have the highest tax burden of any other state, most states that do tax income don’t start taxing it until $500,000+.
Also note, I am not arguing for or against higher or lower taxes for the wealthy, I am simply stating that according to my understanding which I believe to be accurate, you are not making an accurate statement.
Tax cuts whether high or low seem to have little to no effect on tax revenues. Since the Federal Government has been taxing individual income the tax revenues as a percentage of GDP has always been between about 18-20%, depending on economic conditions it would either be on the high or low side of that, with top marginal rates have ranged from 94% (yes, ninety four percent) to 28%. If you look at the data you will see that revenues decrease during recessions, and increase during growth and prosperous periods, all regardless of the tax rates.
That said, the deficits have absolutely nothing to do with tax cuts, tax increases, or lack thereof. Our deficits have everything to do with spending to much damn money. In fact, in the past 70 years the Federal Government has only posted 12 budget surpluses. This is not a uniquely Republican or Democrat problem, politicians from every side have done it to server their own interests as well as the special interests of those who empower them.
Besides, why do we need to tax everybody so much anyways? I’ll leave it there since it would only lead to a philosophical debate on the role of our Federal Government, and as I have learned, people are set in their ways.
Do you not realize the unemployment rate during the Bush years was much lower than anything Obama has seen? Even after 911 it still was lower. Right now I wish we were back to those numbers instead of Obama’s. Check out: http://www.redstate.com/6755mm/2012/07/27/send-this-chart-to-your-bush-hating-friends-who-are-voting-for-obama/
It is surely not just a matter of household economics. Giving nice tax breaks to the wealthiest Mainers and to certain corps. does not generate more revenue unless you believe in the “trickle down” economic theory first promoted by Pres. Reagan and his economic team and later rejected by his own David Stockman.
what the dems theory that welfare helps the economy …. go back to school for basic math man ….
Middle class pays for welfare . The Walmarts of the world benefit . Welfare people shop at Walmart , thier worker collect welfare because they do not pay enough . The biggest commodity Labor cost is lowered by high unemployment . Bad economy is a win win for Walmart. If we could do away with greed and corruption I would vote republican every time . The democrats are not much better.
I recall the economic growth during the Reagan years. Came home from serving our country , chased the American dream ( wife, children , home , good job, etc.etc. ). And became a proud , taxpaying American ! How about you ?
Reagan’s Recession – Pew Research Center
pewresearch.org/pubs/…/reagan-recession-public-opinion-very-negat…14 Dec 2010 – In the depths of the 1981-1982 recession, Americans were far more displeased with their president and his policies than were their …
It hurt me something fierce.
So it goes.
So are the conservatives just simple and forgetful or nasty revisionism ?
Bush who ?
LePage is not about fixing the state budget, he’s about implementing the orders he’s given by the Koch brothers-destroy unions, destroy wage and hour laws, destroy environmental laws, and bring the people to their knees so that they’ll be subservient to the likes of the Kochs and be grateful for whatever pitiful morsels they see fit to throw at the masses. This isn’t about finesse and tact, it’s about being the front man for a bunch of oligarch puppet masters. History is replete with the likes of LePage. As for LePage’s story about his childhood, it becomes more fanciful every time he tells it. While I would agree that LePage had a rough childhood, a good deal of his hardships were the result of his own choices. Also, there are many others whose childhoods were as bad, if not worse, than LePage’s and they aren’t filled with the venom and hate that he is.
” … the Governor could be more artful in articulating his position.”
I think he’s had plenty of time to try doing that and still doesn’t do that.
He’s clearly not capable of doing so. He’s been in over his head from day one.
Stop whining and get on with it!
Bunyan, thank you for modeling exactly the kind of egregious behavior of which Smiley writes. You are case study number one.
Illegals, apparently you missed the point of Smiley’s column.
Bunyan is not being critical of Smiley. Bunyan does not in any way suggest she should not have had dinner with the LePage’s. His comment is not a case study of anything that exists outside your own imagination.
Hardly “modeling” egregious behavior, far from it from her brief description of the vitrolic FaceBook posts.
Perhaps what seems to you to be bullying is tough love. We have taught people to be dependent maybe we can teach them independence. Maybe only someone who has seen the downside and worked their way out can appreciate that.
I’ve been through tough love classes and the Governors behavior all too often doesn’t live up to it.
Tough love “classes”. Do they have a school for that?
Yes, it is called Parris Island! lol.
I often wonder why we have not heard from a single family member or friend of his about his alledged abuse ?Usually there are two sides to every story, but the only story we ever heard is being told over and over again, by Mr.Lepage, and out of those kids in that family he is the only one that was abused ?That strikes many as odd.
There are lots of stories of families where just one of the children is “chosen” for abuse.
Comes down to his motto. He decided not to blame others but to make his own path based on his needs/wants. Maybe he believes as I do that simply sustaining people so they have no purpose is actually exceedingly hateful rather than compassionate.
On the other hand he has also encouraged them to make it on their own instead of giving up and asking the government for help. I think if you were to actually , openmindedly , listen to him for a second you’d find a man who knows he alone is in charge of his survival. A man forced to think for himself in an adult world . Sad that now as governor he has to put up with adults that behave as children.
Beautifully worded!
It would be so much better if Gov. LePage would shut his mouth and THINK about what he is going to say instead if shoving his foot in his mouth up to his tonsils!! This is the way to learn to be a politician, not a bully!!!
Nonews, thank you for modeling exactly the kind of egregious behavior of which Smiley writes. You are case study number five.
Gee, only number 5??? I was trying for number 7 (a lucky number) LOL
And wouldn’t one think that the governor would be more compassionate and kind to poor people, people who need healthcare…and just more decent to everyone considering his background ???? I don’t understand it…Well, yes I do….He got his and forget everyone else…..
I too have serious concerns at times over our Governor’s temperament and delivery. However, separating the truly needy from the seriously lazy has to be undertaken in order to preserve scarce funds. Other governors have not taken on this huge problem. Perhaps it takes someone from the mean streets to get it done. States have to balance their budgets unlike the Federal government that just keeps borrowing to the tune of 16 trillion and rising.
No one argues that it’s not a good time to tighten our belts. However, it’s NEVER appropriate for a leader to sell a budget by ridiculing (as LePage has done prior to and while in office…remember those bus tickets he “said” he was going to pay for? He even lied about that.) the poor or needy. He’s classless, has no real thoughts of his own (well at least any that he’ll let us read) and without a shred of human decency to anyone who’s not a member of his own family or perhaps whom he can use (like poor Mrs. Smiley here and her family) for his own benefit. Not only would I not eat with the man, I wouldn’t even remain in the same building he might walk into. We just saw what he’s done to his own political party, lets not allow him to do the same thing to our entire State. It’s time for members of both parties to tell Mr. LePage to start acting like a leader or get the heck out of the way and let good people do it for him.
Having lost both houses will give us a look at how he handles serious adversity. Know this though, if he gave every voting block just what they wanted -he would be loved by many more-not just the 42%that do approve of the job he is doing. I’ll eat a thick juicy steak from a mean cook any day won’t you?
I’ve worked in kitchens with mean cooks. They’re the ones that spit on your steak when you send it back to be re-heated or because it’s overdone. Moral of the story? Be careful with whom you give your trust.
Touching , but probably not true. That is , the part about you working.
If my math is correct 42% is 5% more then Baldacci 37%. This will be an interesting two years for sure.
Yeah he needs to act like a classy guy named Baldacci and turn a blind eye to the rampent corruption and abuse of taxpayers like the Turnpike Authority, MSHA, or more recently the no-bid contract for health care for the teachers union. What happened to the 86 million anyway? Keep on relaxin
Who really cares what you would do? You’re rants are tiresome.
I have not seen ANY evidence that LePage is proposing to hire more evaluators or to take any other measures to sort out the “truly needy” from the “seriously lazy.” He intends to slash the social safety net, pure and simple, and those desperate people who truly deserve assistance will be thrown to the wolves.
RevOleson, thank you for modeling exactly the kind of egregious behavior of which Smiley writes. You are case study number two.
That does it. You are no judge of behavior, “egregious” or otherwise. Cease and desist.
Gee have we gotten way sicker and disabled in Maine in the psst few years or what
Your boys are growing up in a household that tells them to respect everyone and everyone’s opinion. You are a terrific role model for them and kudos to you for inviting and being invited to dine with people from across the spectrum. Thanks so much for the column.
I too would like to thank the Smileys for a up lifting story. I started to write a totally different comment, but after reading all the hate from the FAR left even on this story I gave up. We have all heard you can’t fix stupid….well now I’m believing you can fix hate. I don’t care what the story maybe, if Gov. LePage or even a family member is mention the hate and name calling comes from the FAR left. These are the same people who say we need to be tolerance of others. The FAR left tolerance ends the second you disagree with their agenda. I say FAR left because I have family and many friends who are Dems. and many of them are shocked with the bitterness and hate from their own party.
Not on FaceBook (thank goodness) so missed the vitriol. I agree, not appropriate. However, not all critics of the Governor are “far left’ nor even”left” for that matter. As for knee-jerk adverse reaction to policies or agendas, hardly exclusive to the “left”. Police the vitriol and name calling from your side of the fence/aisle and those of us to the left of you (including moderates) will attempt to do the same on our side.
I myself am not on face book. You are correct name calling does come from both sides of the aisle. BUT at this time I stand by my statement of the FAR left when it comes to Gov. LePage. As you know it is not hard to tell where someone stands by the contents of their comments. There are some on here that I strongly disagree with, but I have tried to remain respectful and I’m not saying I may have gotten hot a few times. Overall I do try and remain respectful.
I disagree that it’s far left as well. Instead of the problem being in far right or left, I think it’s more an issue of people who never learned to respectfully listen and discuss differences gaining a loud voice with the rise of the internet and social media.
I agree with you 100% on “never learned to respectfully listen and discuss” Read any comment section where Gov. LaPage is mentioned and watch the name calling and hateful comments personal attack on him or his family members.
You don’t think the Gov brings some of this on himself? I am far from a fan. However, I wish he would stop blaming his bad behavior on his childhood. I give him his due that he has an amazing story and he is to complimented for coming so far but don’t say “kiss my butt,” and then blame it on a bad childhood repeatedly.
I do agree the Governor has been is own worst enemy at times. Having said that, I have also liked the fact the Governor when asked a question will give an answer and not some polished political non-answer. Yes he does have a temper. As far as the “kiss my butt” remark goes, if I remember correctly it came out later the Governor had politely turn down their invitation two or more times. The “kiss my butt” didn’t come out till they went to the press and tried to make it a racial issue. Could it have been handle better….yes, but sometimes it is refreshing just to hear a politician speak as you or I might speak if we were really POed.
not every1 on the far L is intolerant & “stupid” (your words).
I did say the Far left tolerance ends when the are disagreed with. I did NOT call anyone “stupid” I use that phrase as an example and change the word “stupid” to hate. I do not call people stupid that I disagree with, because over the years more then once I have found I was the one wrong.
My assumption, given your focus on all things military is that you are a fan of the Governor. Most of us aren’t.
Your assumtion— meaningless
No more meaningless than others’ assumptions or viewpoints.
Or many of the conservatives’ false premises.
“Focus on all things military?” You have me confused with another poster, I believe. I am no fan of the governor’s, but am a fan of someone who is creative enough to start a project like this in part to educate her children by offering up politicians and other Mainers from both slides of the aisle to share casual conversations around the dinner table.
Bangorian’s world is posting comments on the internet, she has no life. I have many liberal, conservative, progressive friends while we may not agree politically none of us take politicians too seriously. They are what they are self serving public servants. Liberals are not going to improve public education, wars will continue, unemployment will remain high, gas and food prices will continue to rise while wages go down. Our cities will continue to deteriorate, we will see more homeless begging on our street corners, but the news media will ignore it because their “guys” are running the show.
Seth Thayer was doing the opposite of what you are doing. His comments are always balanced and fair. He is not taking any sides in this, yet you had to take it in that direction and try and make it divisive. Just the opposite of the message in this piece by Mrs. Smiley.
Actually, I don’t think Seth Thayer is a fan of the governor from comments in the past. I think he was showing some respect for differing points of view..
Isn’t it funny how we, the enlightened, berate our politicians because they don’t work together, across party lines, yet we are so petty, ourselves, that we become angered by Ms. Smiley and her family having dinner at the Blaine House? Until the voters understand that compromise and open-mindedness are necessary to grease the wheels of government, elected officials will continue to please their constituents by tossing wrenches into the works, and we will have the ineffective, dysfunctional governing we’re used to.
And what’s the deal with Angus’ aunt climbing all over people? Maybe she needs to lay off the wine?
Don’t hold your breath!
So what is your non- petty approach to reconciliation with those who proudly declare they will
not , or can not ever, compromise ?
My point was not meant to blame one party over another. Both are guilty of rabid partisanship and, judging by a lot of we commenters, that is the way we prefer it. Often we hear one politician or other being blamed for anything from car accidents to stabbings, which they have absolutely nothing to do with, by any stretch. If we want a functional, thoughtful government, we all need to realize that neither party can have things all their way, and we should begin by not stirring the pot with comments that polarize further.
I respect your decision to attend dinner with the LePage’s at the Blaine House.
However, it should not be surprising that some have reacted so strongly to your decision. Paul LePage’s chosen political style is that of divisiveness. Instead of bringing people together to solve problems, he consistently takes the “pit one side against the other” approach. Time and time again, he has insulted state workers, union members, Democrats, legislators, teachers, welfare recipients, activists whose positions he did not agree with . . . the list goes on.
As you can see from the reaction to your decision, divisiveness creates more divisiveness. Leaders are effective when they get people to work together, not when they drive us apart.
Appalled, thank you for modeling exactly the kind of egregious behavior of which Smiley writes. You are case study number four.
Amen!
No surprise there. Those that preach tolerance are themselves the least tolerant. The only reason the Left (and Leftists) hate LePage is that he has the unmitigated nerve to be Conservative. Were he a liberal they would be holding him up as an icon to perseverance.
Too bad the small, petty minds on the Left can not practice what they preach!
Broad brush smear, exactly counter-productive to what you’re trying to advocate. I agree, the vitriolic FaceBook comments (which I haven’t seen, have you?) sound like hate but criticizing the Governor, his public demeanor, and policies, as has been done mostly in these comments, is appropriate. It isn’t even necessarily from “leftists”.
What is the correct way to deal with foolish thoughts based on false premises, in this the computer age.
Before Facebook it was to ignore it.
Now, it needs to be spaded before it breeds.
Great lessons you are teaching your children and all of us. Thanks and lucky you to have those opportunites and give them to your children.
Great attitude. Thanks for reminding us all. Lucky you to have the opportunity to teach your boys a great lesson.
This kind of nastiness is one of the biggest reasons I fled from the leftist cause. I didn’t want to get any of it on me by being too close to it.
It is so ugly.
Thanks for your column I have enjoyed the adventures of your dinners over the past several months. I am very pleased that you ate at the Blaine House with the LePages. What I am most pleased with is the fact that you have seen what is going on in politics in this state and country. Either you believe my way or I no longer am pleased with you as you have found out on Facebook. Be true to yourself and teach your children what you believe. You can’t go wrong.
I will be the first to say that I largely disagree with the politics of Paul LePage; having said that, there are certain ideas expressed and actions that I respect. Governor LePage is a person, who has had life experiences that have shaped his views, as have we all. I can’t pretend to understand the inner workings of the man, but I can say that about most people I meet.
Governor LePage and his wife invited the Smiley’s to dinner at the Blaine House. I believe the Smiley’s did the honorable and gracious thing by accepting the invitation. That experience will further shape both the Smileys and the LePages beliefs, attitudes, and behavior (maybe in miniscule ways, but it all adds up). It is unfortunate that there are some people that look at people as good/bad based on their political party affiliations. And that is too bad. People are more colorful than that.
An excellent post!
Good article and I hope your children learn by these experiences. It is frightening that when a simple thing like what you are doing turns into a “hate” event….that in itself says it all.
It’s so nice that people went ahead and removed themselves – she was able to rid herself of the toxins and didn’t have to hurt anyone’s feelings!
Good column.
If we were as one dimensional as people on opposing sides would like to believe, life would be simple.
Life is not simple and we are not simple.
We do brilliant things and we do really stupid things.
No one is immune to this.
Regardless of what mistakes and rude comments the governor or anyone else might make, I believe they have a right to make them. And he has the right to be pilloried if they are stupid.
Given where he has come from, his story is compelling and he deserves the same respect we should offer an other person.
My politics are about as far left as you can get – i’m not at all convinced that communism is a bad idea, for example. But even i would jump at the chance to sit down at a table and eat a meal with Governor LePage. Anyone who would unlike your Facebook page for that is a tool, plain and simple.
Thank you for your tolerance. But before embracing communism i suggest you look up some Russians, or Chinese for that matter, who lived under communism and talk to them about what it was really like.
Sarah, as a member of the military (and yes, I do know your husband), I don’t see anything wrong with dining with Gov and Mrs. LePage. I understand that his views may not be popular. But what gives anyone the right to judge who you dine with? And this time around, they invited YOU! (So you didn’t have to cook and you had to ask where the bathroom was.)
You didn’t dine with the Gov because you agree with his politics (just a guess). You had dinner with a family, away from cameras and reporters. And you wrote a story about the experience.
I agree with Seth, Mainewtf, and others. You offer your sons the chance to meet a variety of people and to develop their own opinions. So far, they sound like they get along with everyone! But that is THEIR decision to make.
(So, did he put his elbows on the table or spill anything?)
Well, when you report to a newspaper, write columns, etc. you are accepting that the public who reads your stories/columns/writing can and will judge you.
Also, why ask the questions at the end that are in parentheses? So you can make a judgement on the Governor? See, everyone judges…all the time.
Oh, I’m not as all surprised I’d receive a response. Not even looking for an answer from Sarah.
The comment was not suppose to be a serious comment. I was going to put a “;)” at the end, but hit the “post” button too soon. Just wanted to show that people may not agree with his politics, but they can look beyond the politics and see that he’s just a person. Whoever thought Angus King could be such a sword player with a baguette? Or John Baldacci doesn’t mind mud?
I liked the story of dinner with the teacher. When I was her sons’ ages, I didn’t know my teacher went home at night and thought she lived at the school.
;)
I like cats….. A lot!
Same here…..fantastic, fascinating animals.
I was never a cat person. And then this poor starving stray came into our lives. He has more personality and brains than most of the progressives on here. He is sleeping on the bed behind me now and I look forward every night to when he sneaks in the bedroom and snuggles against either me or my wife’s side. (He likes to wait until he thinks we are asleep. LOL)
Is this what it takes for LePage to be nice is have him over for dinner? I am sure it sounded like a bad idea for some knowing how his record let’s just call it as a professional has been over the years therefore thinking that he would not be professional enough as a civilian around kids either.
I don’t disagree LePage had an abusive childhood, LePage could be a better person all around and not just in certain situations either. Based on what people know of him already he does not get that much respect from many. Could one put aside political differences? Sure they could, but again we are talking about the person, we are not talking about “I think he is terrible as a person because he took down the Mural or disagrees with health care reform” we are talking about his attitude, what he has said about media, groups and a beard somewhere in there too.
If I invited LePage over to my house for dinner it would not be based on what I know of him but what I know about how he is presenting himself.
hello?
Hi.
LePage haters take note of he real LePage.
Sarah, arrange for 10 dinners with very very poor people, dis-advantaged, handi-capped, elderly, for, a hand-full of highfalutin politicians is not a true picture of Maine.
I agree! Great idea!
Been following the dinners. She has had many of the people you list. The political people have been a small part of it.
You know what Maine, grow the heck up! It was a dinner!
It was a not photo op for LePage to use after the results of election suggested he better do something other than open his gob , then ?
You need to shut the hell up. Your points on here are baseless and you don’t have a clue to what you’re talking about. I am sick and tire of you liberals slamming the republicans. You got what you wanted by putting the spending party back in power and I hope you all get whats coming to you. You can pay for lazy people to sit on there couch while you work. That’s if you work. You can say what ever you want but your are clueless. And I know you will flag this because god forbid i offend a liberal!
Interesting column, enjoyed reading it. I’ve been reading the Bangor Daily more often, the Sentinel isn’t what it use to be. Way too bias! I look forward to reading more of your columns.
Nice Story, to bad you had to defend your right to dinners with the Smilies.. Nobody is always right or always wrong.. I congradulated a few politicans on their victories after the electon who knew because I told them I wasn’t voting for them.
In certain African Countries The US Government gives weapons to both sides to keep the wars going, The Britts do the Same, Why? Because if we keep both sides fighting we can get their natural resorces Like oil and Gold and other things.. If they were to settle their differences and controled their own destiny we couldn’t steal their resorces.. Just like here in this country. It would be hard for the criminals from both parties to steal the americans blind if we agreed on things. We can have what both sides want in a capitialist socieity, yet we are split by the Britts so to rob us blind and nobody knows it. You are working to pay Bills..
I think the unfortunate thing about this article is that Mrs. Smiley is trying to sell her followers on the notion that the way you see someone at dinner, necessarily gives you a true picture of what that person is like…and nothing could be more misguided. I’m sure that the desciples who were at the last supper with our Lord Jesus, thought Judas was acting very corually…only to later learn that he had betrayed Jesus in the Garden. And I’m sure that there have been many people murdered at dinner, who would have told anyone had they lived that their host was especially congenial, just before he stabbed them in the back. It’s one thing to give your children the varied experience of meeting and getting to know people from different walks of life and asperations…but it’s something altogether different if you’re trying to give them the notion that the person they met and had dinner with, is necessarily the same person that they will meet should they ever have a need for that person’s help. A person’s true character is not how you may see them over dinner; a person’s true character only comes out when you have the opportunity to see, or be the receiver of, how they weild power. Governor LePaige may be the most gracious host, but he certainly is not a gracious governor, or anything even close to that when weilding his power as governor.
“Governor LePaige may be the most gracious host, but he certainly is not a gracious governor”
Wasn’t that EXACTLY her point? To separate the man from the politics? And isn’t that EXACTLY what she was teaching the children?
Ms. Smiley, I bid you welcome to the patronizing, condescending vitriol of the Left. Many members of Maine’s so-called “liberal” community haven’t an ounce of tolerance when it comes to those who disagree with them. Worse, they now persist in this marvelous fantasy of throwing repeat batches of money at problems for years with precisely the same results, thereby perpetuating the despair of the people they claim to help. Woe is their banner should anyone come along and try a different idea.
Despite being a curmudgeonly old fiscal conservative, I have gone out of my way to publicly support many social causes–gay rights, women’s rights, etc. I would consider it an honor to dine with President Obama, too. I will not, however, sit idly by while members of the Left loot the public tils for their own gain and power while being unable to provide one iota of progress in moving those in need forward into the broad, uplit sunlands of self-reliance.
To question their motives and rationale is to garner a vitriol of hatred from the Left, who, unable to provide any intellectual baiss for fiscal insanity resort instead to ad hominen attacks and propoganda campaigns of mis-information that would make Fidel, “Uncle” Joe and Goebbels proud.
Treat people like you want them to treat you. Everyone wants respect.
Yours is probably the best comment on here.
Just proves that the libs are haters! And hypocrites. They should be embarrassed by this, but they’re not. They live in a world where class warfare is commonplace, compromise means my way or the highway, and their new motto is “ask not what you can do for your country, but what your country can do for you”. JFK would be ashamed of today’s democratic party!
…and you don’t think conservatives would have reacted the same way if she’d visited Baldacci a few years ago? You don’t get it.
Thanks for making my point. Have a nice day.
Sent from my iPad
I thought your point was that liberals are haters and hypocrites. I don’t think they are, but I wouldn’t know. I’m a Republican.
Didn’t you retire, Olympia?
Good one! I admit to drifting since the Reagan administration.
First, I would like to congratulate and thank Gov LePage and his wife for their generosity and kindness. Certainly the opportunity to visit the Blaine house and meet a sitting governor is something your children will remember throughout their lives.
What I don’t understand is your desire to separate the politician from the person. I would never make that distinction. He is what he is politically, and you have to decide what that means to you and your children.
Why do you distinguish a familiarity based upon “only from media accounts”, as opposed a personal relationship (even a temporary one)? Are the media accounts unfair when discussing his personal life? Should we celebrate his success after such a difficult childhood? I say yes, but I don’t think we should expect this story to give us a full understanding of the man.
Should we then consider dinner with any individual as an opportunity for a better understanding? I , again,would argue yes, however I would hard pressed to justify having any kind of relationship with the most notorius people in history. There are many people I would never want to associate with on a personal basis.
I am sure Governor LePage believes he is doing the best for the State of Maine. I would not agree with most of his beliefs, yet I would defend his right to hold them and use them as he deems best. I am sure he would not invite me to a dinner, and if he did, I would politely decline. Your observations are interesting. Your suggestion that we don’t have the whole picture is correct, but not the fault or responsibility of the media. If we had the whole picture, would that change anything politically? I have only the highest regards for your family’s sacrifices, and applaud your success at being a terrific mother. Good luck to all and be well.
nice article. Some people can be so ignorant, huh?
Time you grew up
Wow! Talk about sour grapes. How many times do you plan on badmouthing other posters here? The selfserving crowd who blames the poor or needy for all their problems just took a significant beating at the poles. Guess some are slower learners than others. Keep it up, we’ll get back to you in November of 2014.
Face it you have no answers for the poor and needy you use them to hold onto to POWER.
So do all those Southern red States… (you know, how like how Boss Romney won in the Confederacy, so may-be he might consider being the President in Richman, Va., now),
… contribute to or take more from the Federal coffers ?
Most of us consider the source, Still, and realize that “ath2o” should drop the “2,” in the user name, to more accurately reflect the part of his anatomy where his/her thoughts originate.
I know Kate Dickerson she tried to address some real issues but was shot down almost every time . I do not think Smiley would even see the issues. Bangor high School may have some of the highest test scores but also Had some of the highest drop out rates . If Dr. Webb want credit for the high test scores she should have taken the blame for the high dropout rates . She always seemed to divert from taking blame . Now son is in the Bangor school system I was told by a school Rep (he needs to be on medicine ) He is a very well behaved kid. Maybe he should be but they are not medical Doctors and have no business playing one. Some of my sons classes 50% grade was homework 30% test scores 20% participation . Hmmmmm Well I kid could fail every test and still get a 91 if his stay at home mommy did his homework. but if they got 100% on every test the best they could hope for is a 50 F without doing homework. I have little control over what happens when he is at his mothers during the school week . Now let me say this some kids do not grow up in environments conducive to doing homework . I do not wish to go into details here . I know most teachers care a great deal but seems to me test score on those state test always mean more than teaching. The system seems to be biased in favor of the upper middle class and those with connections.
When I was a boy, I did NO homework, and passed most tests with 90’s or 100. II had a terriffic memory and memorized everything the teacher said in class.
The big surprise to me is the ONLY skill that I learned in high school that I still use today is typing.
Man! I surely agree with this – especially the last sentence!
And to think: I only took typing because that’s where the girls were!
No easy answer . My biggest concern is the weight placed on standardized test above all else except maybe sports ($7,000,000 football field) If they have a few drop out it as not as big a deal as the test scores . In fact at risk kids bring down test scores . When teacher pay is based on test scores and not so much on letting them care about the student we have more serious problems. College is not for everyone but seems like an average upper class kid has a better chance than an above average lower class kid in the system we have now.
Enjoyed your writing Sarah. It was refreshing to read after much spirited debate here today. Thanks so much for sharing. I think your boys are most fortunate to meet so many diverse people and yet just be, free to be themselves.
It is apparent that those who disliked the Smileys for attending the Blaine House dinner are a bit envious that her family members were able to do so.
The LePages are a wonderful, humble couple who entertain graciously and treat people with utter respect. They govern from their hearts, and that is what others would find if they only had the opportunity.
A positive headline would have been nice: “The Smiley family enjoyed their dinner at the Blaine House.”
Those that de-friended you were never your friends in the first place. This is an invaluable experience for your kids, they will remember it for life.
When my youngest son was 8 or 9, I forget which he had the chance to spend a day with me at Ft. Devens in Massachusetts, he got to hang around all day with the guys from 10th Special Forces, he rode in a helicopter, shot an M-60 and had chow in the field. We lived in Medfield, MA at the time, the kids in school didn’t quite believe Andrew when he told him of his day, till a couple of days later a young Capt from 10th came by the school, dropped in on Andrews class, and verified all that Andrew had said.
Your boys are having the same experience, don’t let a couple of phony, good time charlie friends, mess it up for you and the boys.
It’s too bad that such small minded people live in this State. But most are “on the system” and getting something from either the State or the Federal Government and are worried that Gov LePage might make them (Heaven help us) work for it. You did a great thing Sarah, and your boys will be better because of it. Don’t listen or worry about the lack of support from these poor entitled people.
Your right most even the well to do are on the system . Bail outs , Money given not to grow crops,oil companies , Walmart because they do not pay thier help enough to live on. Even they rich are on the system .
GET
A
LIFE
YOUR premise being what exactly, Bandbox ?
; 0
Sara I hope you listen to the concerns of the people about the Bangor School System and address them objectively at School board meetings . I respect the fact you met with Lepage but hope that this is not political . Listen to all sides and represent the people of your great city . Seems both the dems and the republicans always fight we are not so different we all care just have different ideas about what is helpful for the people. Lets not make the School board political make it for the people maybe invite some concerned parents and student to dinner .
With your husband deployed, the daily challenges of raising a young family the past year have been immense. Guests for dinner will be great memories for all for years to come. Sarah, you have done a great job !!
Your columns often brings back fond memories of things my parents taught me as a young child. Important lessons you learn at a young age that stick with you forever.
Keep up the great work !!
Well said!
The honor of filling a veteran’s chair or his shoes should never be given to a man who, after his student deferment was over, took off for Canada during ‘Nam.
Did you make the same type of comment when Angus King was the dinner guest?
Did King spend ‘Nam in Canada?
No, he spent it in Maine on a rarely issued deferment he got through his family’s political connections. King had a very low draft number, LePage a very high one. King likely would’ve gone had he not been connected; LePage likely would not have gone but not because he used connections.
Oh, just like the forgotten Bush, then, right ?
Where was Mitt during Nam ?
When did Bush and Mitt have dinner with the Smileys?
Yet a non vet like Mike Michaud can get reelected because he managed to help get the voting veteran some help !
Did Michaud spend ‘Nam in Canada?
Gov. Lepage spent most of ‘Nam in the US. He didn’t go to Canada until after his draft eligibility expired. Your point?
He didn’t need his student deferent after 1970. He was subject to the draft lottery in December 1969 and his birthdate received #342. Didn’t leave for Canada until 1971 to get married and take a job in her father’s business. http://thephoenix.com/boston/news/132743-making-of-paul-lepage-part-2/
If being ignorant is a prerequisite to being a democrat, you are in.
“If being ignorant is a prerequisite to being a democrat, you are in.”.
There is really clean, well stated false premise.
Being so perfect in its form it is easily dealt with :
So is it true that being ignorant is a prerequisite to being a democrat ?
If true, the burden of proof is on you as it is your contention.
So show us that you ready do know stuff , please. by providing the proof of your…
errr … premise.
If not what does that do to your point ?
How much respect does the point or its author ever logically merit if he does not,
or can not, prove his conditional premise ?
Are there any common terms for that ?
What are few that you think of ?
I’m sure that you can.
Just read your posts Mitt.
I have met my share of ignorant R in my life.
It is sad that we live in such a miasma of bitterness. I liked both Romney and Obama, but what their campaigns did to them as persons filled me with disgust. I do not agree with all of LePage’s politics, but I know he has the best interest of the people of Maine at heart.
” And Gov. LePage is nothing if not human with his incredible childhood story of perseverance.”
ROFL, good one, oh what you really believe this liar. Some people are just too gullible, perhaps that is why people un-friended you, you swallowed this guys kool aid.
“How could any of this — regardless of your opinion of the governor’s politics — have been a negative thing for my children?”
You obviously forgot to tell them he said he would tell our President to go to hell.
And you swallowed o ba. mas !
you swallowed bush twice
Now don’t be a sore loser I have been able to open a new LLC business since Obama’s re-election, my new start-up company is called “Crybabies are US”. We can forward, most anything, including, your illegal Latino
maid that you acquired from Mexico, how about that dressage
horse, yes we can, business it great and it will be great for America too. ……… Sorry your .50 cal machine guns and fertilizer bombs
will not pass customs but you can pick up new ones in your new fascist country of choice.
Just
call me at 1-800-Cry-Baby, that’s 1-800-Cry-Baby for you Fox, Drudge, Rush, etc. types you know
the slow types, that’s (won ate Hun Dread To Sevin Nein To To To
Nein), we will forward your garbage… I mean goods to any Fascist country
of your choice. We will also offer a 50% discount to the first 1,000,000
callers, just use the special key word IAMARETARD…………… see who said electing
Obama would be bad for business I am expecting a boon in business from
you extremists. So let’s move quickly on this we really want you out by
the end of the year at the latest, it will take at least 4 more years to
get your stench out of this great country of ours. LMGDFAO!
Yup and our tax returns have been cut to in half as of obama, his 1st year we got back over 3k, 2nd year it was less then 1500 and no change in our wages, so explain that one, can not wait to see how much it will drop now, and by the way we make less then 100k a year, so much for that I have not taken 1 dime from the middle class.
Well Jed if you cut your tax RETURNS in half……… now there’s your problem the IRS only had half a return to work with. LOL! You guys think that if you say it it is true. Too much Fox Snooze for you.
What one receives as a refund or “gets back” is not a way to measure what one pays in taxes. Tax withholding tables change year to year even if one doesn’t change their W-4. I see very little in the tax laws that would raise taxes as much as you infer since the President took office. If one is a state employee or teacher then their taxes could have gone up. The government had a tax credit called “making work pay” which went to most who worked. That was changed to a 2% reduction in FICA which state employees and teacher don’t pay on their state and teacher salaries.
Try therapy and medical marijuana. Both covered under Obamacare.
I agree with him telling the pres to find a new place to go.
Your hate is noted, You will never find anything about our Governor exceptable.. That makes your comments irrealevant because they are biased
LOL MY hate is noted????????? I do find our Gubor unexceptable or unacceptable, or both for the fox crowd so they can follow along, and if my comments are irrealevant or irrelevant or both again for the same reason, because they are biased what does that make you and yours. Besides dumb and dumber wait you won’t understand so it would be dum and dummer, there now youse kan reeds it.
Get your tissues out and get over it…. Mr LePage will be in office for the next 6 yrs…
hahahahahha—funniest thing i’ve heard so far today
You are unhappy, you are bitter and you feel the need to attack in situations where it is completely unwarranted. It’s possible that your mother didn’t hold you enough as a child but the fact remains… you are one dismal character.
‘You are unhappy, you are bitter”
From MD 20-20 ? lol.
There is a name you can trust when comes to knowing all about bitter unhappiness, for sure.
So while I’ll not disagree too much with nozitiforme : “Political hate rhetoric comes equally from both sides of the fence ” because it is a reasonable starting premise, anyway, but impossible to prove, I must comment on how some think defending their own false premises is a winning argument.
Meplumber’s …(another expert on what he talks, just perhaps ) his premise is that because I’m not toting his party line I must be on welfare, and because he thinks he is paying for all my food, that makes him the boss of me and of course that means he is entitled, in his mind, to disrespect me.
There it is my favorite false premise, here.
MD 20-20’s premise, saying that I must be unhappy makes my laugh merrily.
Go figure the value in her premise, then.
So forget name calling, nozitiforme, it is too subjective and juvenile to be good data, but by your count who makes up more off topic false premises, then thinks they’ve won, because not commenting on udder foolish, at at, is more polite than calling its author what they must be.
A point Ms. Smilely might consider before blaming her readers for allowing a slick operater to corrupt her project.
This is coming as soon as the election is over for good reason.
Now partisan excess is longer an excuse for judging others and thinking you’ll not be judged right back for being just what you are.
So re:”You are unhappy, you are bitter and you feel the need to attack in situations where it is completely unwarranted. ”
MD are unwarranted personal attacks based on false premises, which are really just negative biased opinion, really better than “attacking the the situation”,
whatever that means …( the topic* may-be) … because
… well, please, do tell us why ..
Then someone can count up which sort does it most, here so far, at least.
* is her “situation” that I’m disagreeing with the conventional thinking, the party line, and so creating a bad situation for her, may-be ?
So how does projection of her false premises on anyone really effect the situation ?
I notice that comments now must be popular, as well as conform to BDN guidelines.
The P.C. crowd that thinks Maine is too white and old and we should have absolute diversity of color age, and religion, is not so enamored with diversity of opinion.
I was flagged off the board the other day for saying that parents should pick up a higher precentage of school costs than folks without children. Opps, very unpopular, post removed.
I find Jesus offensive, I find evangelism offensive. I find welfare clients having multiple children offensive. I do not flag these people off the board.
Do you think that sometimes it is not the content of the remark but the manner in which it is expressed? I know many times it is a judgment call . What one person might find offensive, another might not, and vice versa.
I remember several posters, and one in particular, who consistently called anyone who disagreed with their position bigots and racists. I never saw their posts removed or their accounts blocked although this is a direct and vile attack on another poster. This is a direct violation of the BDN “guidelines”.
I myself have been blocked for less and for a single violation. Of course I post consistently against BDN editorial positions and I realize that using any excuse for blocking my account is valid in BDN editor eyes.
And those calling others bigots and racists are in agreement with BDN editorial policies.
This double standard is why we dropped our BDN subscription. The double standard upsets me more than their actual positions do.
A higher percentage? Only if those who’ve already gone through the system as children and or have had kids that have gone through the system, pay retroactively. Sticking young parents with a higher percentage that generations before them never paid, is unfair. I can see why it’s an unpopular idea. Though not likely the source of removal. :)
Sarah Smiley- I think your plan to invite well-known guests to your family dinner is great. For me, the problem is the change in your format. When you invite someone to dinner and they accept, they have accepted an invitation to live for a short time in your environment and by your rules and customs, and they have also accepted a bit of an obligation to you; they “owe” you. Having a dinner at the Governor’s official residence makes you the person who “owes” the social debt, and you have not taken the Governor out of his own comfort zone. You and your readers did not get to see what the Governor might be like when he is in an unfamiliar space without the support of his official trappings and playing his role as head of Maine State.
she doesn’t owe anyone anything., She said in the story she was pleased to be invited to the Blaine house. A part of history few will experence.
Well said, Sarah. Great column and you’ve shown the left how they behave. Kudos!
As usual, you missed the whole point of her article. You completely misinterpreted what she was saying. She was not criticizing any one party. People like you keep the divisiveness going.
Up until recently, our great nation has prospered in democracy as, unlike many parts of the world, Americans have always been able to “agree to disagree”, a necessity if we the people are to continue to act like civilized folk, instead of turning to killing those we disagree with, as they do in some other cultures, in other parts of the world.
There are those who have often said that the “conservative side” of the aisle has been full of hate, bitterness and vitriol while the “liberal side of the aisle” has long been the party of “compassion and tolerance! Seems lately like things have turned around drastically.
The election of Gov Paul Lepage changed this in Maine, two years ago. People either “love him” or, as you saw, “hate him”. It is not just disagreemnent with his political ideas, but hatred of the fact that the man is even alive! The comments pages on the BDN have been full of this insanity, as the same posters launch the same attacks, over and over, even on stories that have nothing to do with Gov Lepage.
The Gay Marriage political battle in Maine was loaded with this same kind of rhetoric, and actions. Treworgy’s Orchards, in Levant, simply posted a “no on one” sign in front of their business, as they had a perfect right to do. They later explained their position in a way that demonstrated compassion, grace and class, not much of which was demonstrated by the opposition. They were vehemently attacked, face to face, in the media, and all over Facebook for daring to voice their personal opinon on a topic of the day.
Our nation has become more “divided” as our culture has become “dumbed down” in numerous, and too many to mention, ways. Many now exhibit levels of selfishness and disrespect that were non-existent when I grew up in the 1950’s and 60’s.
I dislike Barak Obama as President as I disagree with many of his political ideas. I would like to think though that my wife and I and our three sons could sit down at a table with him and his family, and partake of a meal, in a civil and respectful manner. If our sons turn out NOT to be able to do that, then we failed both them, and our American culture.
All we can do is to do as you, and we, have done. Try to raise our children to be responsbile adults who can treat others with respect and understanding, even in the face of often bitter disagreement.
Unfortunately, if one reads history, one can see where the lack of the ability to be able to “disagree without being disagreeable” leads to. As I see this level of bitterness, hatred and vitriol rising, among the American people, I ponder, with grave concerns, just what kind of a world your children and grandchildren, and ours, will be living in. It is an unsettling thing to contemplate!
You can teach your kids all you want then the go to school, and are taught all the hate, by the liberal teachers, which is a majority in all levels of schooling, I do not dislike obama, I do not know him, I sure do not like his vision for this country, try living in another country I have been in 13, we have the better system, and we do not need to become Europe, that is why the folks left there over 200 years ago and came here, if you want to live in a socialist country then move there and leave ours alone, it works. If you do not like something in our Constitution the amend it, that is why it can be amended, try that in Cuba and see how far you get. The everyone get a trophy does not work and is the reason why the younger generation is so dam lazy, dont work hard get a prize any way, heard it today on TV, even if your not the winner your the winner? WHAT. give me a break, there are winners and loosers period, sometime your feelings get hurt, learn from it, but because you loose does not mean you have to change your values and beliefs. Weather its an election or a football game. Stick to your guns no matter what.
What a sweet, gooey . . . and totally boring . . . article.
Whay is this not a suprise..The liberal democrats have no intent of being anything than mean and hateful….washington fails to get anything done because of this attitude!!
Right on the point, and then the dems blame the republicans for the hate being spread, right out of the book “Rules for Radicials”
This is exactly what it should mean to celebrate diversity. How amazing for your boys to have these experiences and how right you are to separate the human being from his/her political views!
Exactly!
Rather,
the purpose has been to fill up, rather than wish away, our time until
my husband returns next month.
Then why not have dinner with your neighbors or your friends, or gasp, family? Other than the grandstanding and picture ops, I guess I’m missing the point(?)
You probably don’t get this, but when Sarah is having dinner with all these widely known folks, she is on her job. I doubt very seriously that the BDN would accept more than one column about lunch with a generic neighbor.
Also She has three sons, and their dad is in the service of our country. She alone has the job of making sure that these boys move that American “step up” from where she and her husband live. You suppose that generic neighbor’s recomendation on a job application would be worth as much as Senator Collins’?
I had problems with Sarah’s prose early on. I got the feeling her job was more important than her children. I was wrong.
I’ve followed all the dinners. She HAS had lots of dinners with “generic neighbors.” Do a little research before you comment.
Just counted. 29 of the 50 dinners have been with people that aren’t famous. They are teachers, firemen, neighbors, artists, ministers.
Understood – though without the cameras and articles, would these “widely known folks” have just sat down with her? She’s not the only mom (or dad) single parenting while the other is overseas. Just seems kind of phony.
Very well said!
great story!! thanks for sharing
The problem with today’s society is that it seems that the art of debate is gone, No one wants to hear what anyone else is saying and they don’t for a second try to see the problem from the other person’s side.
Yep. Even when presented with a good argument or rebuttal, conceding of points is something almost never seen, either in DC, or on a message board such as this.
Concession has become a sign of weakness, rather than a sign of humility, open mindedness and ability to learn. Sad how low some of us have gone. :{
Yup and there is that word “open minded” If you think like the dems you are evolving, “open minded” if you have different values your a bigot, racist, homofobe ect…………… the list the dems throw around are endless.
Well, being open minded to good ideas and factual points does not mean one has to praise or accept factually inaccurate or actually racist, bigoted or homophobic comments.
Opinions are well and good to argue about, though facts should not be arguable or debatable items. Unfortunately, there are often two sets of facts. Which is of course, absurd. Fact is fact.
Way to paint with a broad brush. Not all democrats are like that just like not all Republicans are judgemental naysayers.
This is the first column written by you in a long time that I really liked. I voted for Paul LePage because the story of his childhood sounded like my father’s story of his. The rough life of a foster child during the depression. In my father’s case that life made him respect anyone who worked, no matter how menial the job. It did not do that for Paul.
I respect that the man is trying, and I am sure that one to one he is a fantastic host. I wish he would learn how to convey his story and his direction to the people. BUT Dad was the same way, pretty much no patience with folks who couldn’t understand the message.
Maybe you could act as his interpreter
for the remainder of his term. you do a great job of showing his human side.
Great column. Thank You.
People are childish – especially on facebook. Who cares if someone ‘likes’ a page? It just shows the lack of civility left in this world – sadly.
Yup shows the true colors of the dems, lets all get along, the party of toleration, as long as you agree to their terms, the dems are the real ones that push the its our way or the highway, or we will make your life a living hell, by boycotting your business, leaving you nasty messages on your Fb page emails, ect… what ever happened to someone can disagree with what you think without being labeled is over and the dems are the king of the village.
very well written column …it is a shame so many in this country/state have become so polarized politically …….. hopefully we will grow out of it soon……and return to being Americans
Sarah I never thought your views were either liberal or conservative, however your boys have just witnessed first hand how intolerant the left is. In my neighborhood it’s the kids with lefty parents who are always fighting with each other while their parents can’t get along with anyone. The conservative parents are usually busy lending a helping hand to someone in need.
Sarah, I think you still owe Gov. LePage a dinner. Or does it still count as “Dinner with the Smileys” if you ate at his house?
My other post got flagged but I hope that you are as open minded with you need job as school board member and represent the people not just Betsy Webb as most other school Board member seem to have done.
My wife and I had a similar experience and got to spend time with Gov. and Ann LePage. Gracious, funny and great listeners. Got to sit with the King’s at a dinner one night – good people, too. Sorry you took grief, but your kids will never forget it.
Thank you for the perspective, people tend to forget that our leaders are human beings too, it’s not healthy to have that much anger.
Good lord what is wrong with people? I think gov LePage is a vile leader, but I’d still go to dinner if invited. Why not get a chance to know someone a little better, get to see what makes them tick?
This was an awesome opportunity for the children, one that they’ll never forget.
It never ceases to amaze me how people politicize everything.
I think Ms. Smiley missed a big point that only one of the commenters mentioned. Having guests in your home is a far different event than being a guest. Ms. Smiley may have no interest in political activities at her home and perhaps was able to welcome her guests as one might welcome newly found relatives. It does not seem as if there were ulterior motives by the guests who had Dinner With the Smileys at the Smiley’s home. That is not the case when the Smiley’s Went to Dinner. Ms. Smiley does not appear to be a naive woman. Being invited to Dine With the Gov. at his house has certain factors to consider. One of them would be what the political perspective would be. She now knows how her actions were perceived.