by Ardeana Hamlin
of The Weekly Staff
Nancy Morey, 64, of Bangor knows first-hand that the Bangor YMCA is there whenever it’s needed. And these days, she needs it a lot.
Morey and her late husband of 42 years raised four children, who are grown and on their own. Now, she is raising by herself her two grandsons, Ian, 7, a first-grader at Abraham Lincoln School and who attends the Y Before and After School Program, and Eli, 4, who attends the Y Early Childhood Program.
“My husband and I were doing this together,” Morey said, of raising her grandsons. “Then he got sick. Within two weeks my husband was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and was gone. His passing was enormous. It was profoundly challenging for the boys and for my [grown up] children. I didn’t know what to do and the Y was there for me.”
Bangor Y Director Diane Dickerson, sensing the stress Morey was under, reached out. “Diane assured me that children would be safe and well cared for in Y programs,” Morey recalled. “I needed to work to support them. People at the Y understood Ian was going through things and that he needed extra attention. I am so grateful to the Y.”
Morey said Eli has lived in her home since he was a baby, and Ian has lived since birth with his grandparents. The passing of his grandfather is especially difficult for him.
To help keep Ian busy and focused on something besides grief, the Bangor Y came up with scholarships so he could attend Camp Peirce-Webber, the Y’s day camp in Hampden. “It was really great fun for him,” said Morey, who owns and operates English Locks, a hair salon in her home.
“The Y has a very special place in my heart,” Morey said. “Ian and Eli are thriving so well in the programs. Caring people who serve as models for them work there. Eli just loves it. People care — in the Y program and outside of the Y. They know him and confirm that he is special,” she said.
When Ian had upsets because of losing his grandfather, Y staff “helped him feel validated and special. They handle issues beautifully,” she said.
Morey said Ian and Eli are active boys who already love sports. She plans to enroll them in a soccer program and wants to enroll Ian in the Y’s Barracuda swim team program.
“I’m trying to give them the best I can, I want them to have a safe upbringing,” Morey said. Helping with raising the boys is Morey’s daughter, Anna, 29, who, due to paralysis, uses a wheelchair. “She helps as much as she can,” Morey said. “She is a wonderful aunt — truly amazing.”
The challenges of bringing up her grandsons are pretty much the same challenges most parents face in the course of the day, Morey said. “It’s the everyday challenges — time, organizing our lives, the works hours, no down time, taking care of a big house. But I try to make the day-to-day things an adventure — the boys like to help shovel snow. I teach them how to do things [to help],” she said.