I’m no Dr. Phil and I don’t have any certifiable qualifications for offering relationship advice, but I always thought I had a pretty good idea of the criteria for a successful marriage.
Candlelit dinners at a fine Italian restaurant. Romantic walks on the beach. Ten days of magical Maui sunsets. Or perhaps simply celebrating every anniversary and birthday without setting a reminder on my iPhone.
That all changed about six years ago when my wife and I bought kayaks in the months preceding COVID. They weren’t just any kayaks, but watercraft made for the novice angler.
In the years following that purchase, it has become clear to me that the secret to a happy marriage is — kayak fishing.
While we haven’t completely eliminated other forms of romanticism, our dates these days often consist of loading kayaks onto the trailer, making the 45-minute drive to the state park, backing down the boat ramp and fishing for smallies and largemouth until the park rangers blast a closing time warning to us on their bullhorns.
Forget the fine dining. Instead of perusing a menu and pondering a choice between the petit filets and a lamb shank, we now debate the best tackle for bass: Texas rig or wacky rig?
During the pandemic, kayak fishing was an ideal activity. We were outdoors, far from a contagious environment. In the chaos and uncertainty of a global health crisis, we could find serenity on the pond.
Fishing was not new to my wife. She was weaned on bluegill fishing with Wonder Bread on the lakes of New Jersey. And she has made me promise that when she passes that I would roll her ashes in Wonder Bread and feed them to the fishes, according to state regulations of course.
And when we visit Maui, one of our favorite vacation destinations, we always planned a fishing trip with our captain and friend, Tad Luckey (perfect name for a charter captain). Unfortunately, the horrendous Lahaina fires ended our annual fishing excursions in paradise.
Whether it’s in a tropical setting or one of Maine’s many robust fisheries, my wife savors every angling opportunity. The difference is that she’s taken it to another level since getting “hooked” on kayak fishing.
As her passion has grown, so has her appetite for fancier gear. She now has an upgraded Native pedal kayak. I have an Old Town Minnkota with an electric motor. She considers that cheating, but I must confess that I don’t feel too guilty about getting to my favorite fishing spots a little faster. Honestly, she enjoys the exercise she derives from pedaling.
She also has her favorite hooks — brand, type and size — and won’t settle for less. Besides gear, she’s become more proficient with her technique and more adept at removing embedded hooks from her fish. No longer does she implore me, from hundreds of yards away, to assist her getting the fish off her hook before it becomes a convenient meal for a vigilant bald eagle perched on the treetops.
Succinctly, she’s become quite skilled at kayak fishing and regularly outfishes me. Honestly, I don’t mind being runner-up since it seems to enhance our relationship.
If she has a complaint, it’s that fishing kayaks seem to be heavier than recreational vessels and no kayak company has produced a lighter, woman-friendly version that she can handle herself when going solo. Old Town, are you listening?
Loading and unloading a kayak has become more challenging as we enter our senior years and various injuries and ailments have limited our ability to easily maneuver our boats. So for her birthday this year I got her a set of wheels that attach to the kayak, making it a bit easier to handle. Still, we face the reality that there is probably a termination date on this preferred method of fishing.
We try not to think about how many years we’ll still be able to fish from our kayaks. We may shed a tear or two when the time finally arrives. Meanwhile, we are savoring our romantic moments on the water, casting a plastic worm, letting it drift to the bottom and experiencing the thrill of hooking into a five-pound largemouth in the twilight hours.
There will still be romantic dinners, walks on the beach and sunsets on Maui. But really can there be any better way to sustain a happy marriage than kayak fishing?
If you disagree, my wife would like to have a few words with you.